Dating. It's the one word that has fueled countless plotlines for TV shows, caused women to spend days laying out outfits, terrified us when we have had to endure the process, while humored us when we have witnessed it. Now, if you've read my past article on love, you might think: "A little redundant, isn't she? After all, marriage and dating are quite similar." Well, you're wrong. Marriage is when your father looks at your boyfriend through tears, thinking of how to tell the guy he knows will take care of you to take care of you. Dating is when your father looks at your boyfriend through crosshairs, thinking of how to tell the guy that he'd better take care of you, or his finger might just slip.

These events are worlds apart. I've always been curious about the different manifestations of a courtship. One guy took the theory of "teasing shows a girl that you like her" too far by banging his desk against mine several times, causing all my papers to fall off of my desk, until I threw a book at him. Of course, rather than taking this as a sign of irritation, he believed that I was encouraging him, and proceeded to throw my book back at me. When asked about his actions, he grinned and replied, "You know, this is believed to be a sign of affection." I think he was mildly insulted when I asked him which handbook he had been using.

One aspect of American dating that I find particularly intriguing is the use of pickup lines. I actually stole a book called "How to Meet Women" from my formerly desperate cousin (he seems to have managed, since he was married recently to a girl that he found by himself). I'm not sure if he actually used any of the pickup lines learned from the book, as they involved lines such as, "I'm sorry, I seem to have lost my phone number; can I borrow yours?" Classic.

The process of an "affair of love" has always fascinated me; the conversations, the flirtations, the awkwardness. I find it endlessly amusing. I decided to pull an investigative journalist stunt, and find out the differences between American and Indian relationships. I soon learned that Indian marriages are more similar to business arrangements, but is there dating in India? Or rather, what are the differences between American and Indian customs when it comes to dating?

Dating is always a bit nerve-racking in the Western world. Even in high school, when we all consider ourselves so cool and confident, we are completely befuddled by the opposite sex. Girls don't want to be seen as promiscuous, while guys don't want to be viewed as "whipped." The romanticization of the first date has now been replaced with "hooking up," which carries different meanings for different people. Perhaps the base system may need to be reevaluated.

In high school, the typical date involves anything from going out for coffee to going to an amusement park. While I would rather not throw up on my date after riding the Boomerang at Six Flags, I suppose there is a certain appeal to the Ferris wheel, as we have learned from "The O.C." and "Everwood." Especially if it gets stuck, and the boy is afraid of heights. If the couple is too young to drive, older siblings can come in handy, as no one wants to go through the parental inquisition. I suppose high school dating can be seen as more of a precedent for real life that an actual romantic relationship.

Although I have never dated in India, through countless interviews with random cousins, I discovered that dating has made its debut in larger, more westernized cities of the homeland. Though dating is still not totally socially accepted, it does occur. Through an unintentional, unwanted, but in the end, productive interview with an odd young man whom we shall refer to as "punching boy," I learned of the true antics of Indian teenagers.

Now, "punching boy" was hell-bent on convincing me that he had a girlfriend, so much so that I eventually began to doubt him. He went so far as to tell me of the various pairs of shoes that she owned, inquired as to what size pants I wore in case he wanted to bring some home to her, and told me "how hard the two of us partied before exams." I suppose that he could've been telling me this to make himself feel less like the loser he was, as he proceeded to tell me how he punched some guy in the face for calling him a derogatory term, hence the nickname. Go figure.

I did, however, learn that dating is more common in the larger cities such as Bombay, but that one-on-one dates aren't that popular, with most opting for the large group option, as to avoid confrontations with irate parents as to what your intentions are. To sidestep this possibility, boyfriends and girlfriends are often established by their teens, but these aren't known by the parents. Perhaps in years to come, dating will become more socially acceptable. And we will all see shotgun prices skyrocket in India.

Perhaps I'm being too cynical on the dating front. I mean, shouldn't these people who venture out into the cold, hard world of dating get some credit? Whether the reason for pursuing a relationship is for companionship, for money, for parents' approval or disapproval, our culture has written off all of these hopefuls as dreamers, and left the seduction up to the parents, the relatives...and to the Web sites. Maybe we're moving too fast, and can't keep up with evolution. What's next?

The world has gone from arranged marriages, where the bride doesn't see the groom until the wedding, to Internet dates, where the person very well might be an ax murderer, but we'll never know until we set up a meeting. When did the idea of "the date" disappear? Was it between the cell phone and the Internet revolution? Before text messaging became an alternative to flirting, face-to-face? Let's give dating a bit longer, and see where it takes us, before we end up in a virtual house with a spouse whom we've never seen, but match up with a "100% compatibility rate" according to the online survey we took.

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT DATING IN AMERICA? WHAT CHALLENGES DO YOU OR YOUR FAMILY FACE? ANY GREAT SUCCESS STORIES OR SUGGESTIONS ON WHAT OTHERS CAN DO TO HELP EASE THE WOES OF COURTSHIP? iF SO, EMAIL US AT INFO@INDIANLIFEANDSTYLE.COM.